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Joke of the Day
"My Nephew's pet chicken died. I couldn't help asking if the funeral will be fried or roasted."
Next Joke
"2 guys with Alzheimer's. ""I'm off to go get some ice cream, do you want some?"" ""Yeah sure"" Shortly later, he returns. ""Here, I brought you your fish"" ""Fish!.............. where's my fucking chips."""
"If a car is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? Zero! Snakes don't have armpits!"
"A missionary noticed a particularly happy cannibal Missionary: Joe, you look unusually cheery today. CannibalJoe: Today wife gave me head"
"Pretty sure my first black friend was ""The Wire."""
"If you love Christmas so much, why don't you merry it?"
"Boy, people who need attention continue to find new ways to get it, he tweeted."
"A man buys some chocolate pudding from a sweets shop, and finds it's turned a sickly green color. He says to the manager, ""this is off pudding."""
"I had an addiction to soap... but thanks to some dirty bastards stealing all of it, I am clean now."
"What do you call a British guy who throws a spear through the knee? Britney Spears"