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Joke of the Day

"I painted my computer black so it would run faster. Now it doesn't work. Then I painted my computer white so it would work. Now the whole system is corrupt."

"Flirting is a way of life, the moment you stop is when you're dead ... then your spouse cleans the gun and places it in your hand."

"What do Apple and the US economy have in common now? No Jobs"

"An old teacher asked her student... ""If I say, 'I am beautiful,' which tense is that?"" The student replied, ""It is obviously past."""

"After spending over 3 decades in the hard candy business, I've had enough... I've finally realized it's for suckers."

"When I was 8 yrs old, I walked to school by myself; now you have to hold your kid's hand right up to their first drug deal."

"Called the front desk of our motel and told him ""I've gotta leak in the sink."" He said ""That's OK, just rinse it out when you're done."""

"cat: mew me: actually its about games in journalism *cat continues to ask for food*"

"What's the difference between a singer-songwriter and a puppy? A puppy eventually grows up and stops whining. Thanks to PuddinHead742 for this one."

"ELI101: How do people not get binary?"