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Joke of the Day

"You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink... Not if Guantanamo Bay has anything to say about it."

"How do you make a kilogram of fat appealing? Put a nipple on it"

"I shouldn't have plugged my iPhone into the PC at the Kitchen It's now in the sync."

"I don't get laid on Saturdays. The last two words were unnecessary."

"This year, measuring your accomplishments against Lindsay Lohan's will ensure you feel like a winner merely for avoiding the penal system."

"Why do the ladies love Jesus? Because he was hung like this! (spread arms out)"

"What should we call this giant advertising board? Phil: A philboard Bill: I have a better idea"

"Have you heard about Karma, the new restaurant? There's no menu. You just get what you deserve."

"Did you hear about the prostitute with an MBA? She was a business anal-ist."

"How did the pirate fix the hole in his pants? He used an eyepatch"