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Joke of the Day

"Obama could eat children alone under a bridge hunched over like Gollum in a thunder storm and he'd still be better than Bush."

Next Joke
 
"When I win the lottery I'm getting a pool boy, maybe I'll even get a pool."
"I'm not sure where you ladies go to learn how to argue, but that place is good"
"I went to the shop and bought a Christmas Tree. The assistant asked me, ""Will you be putting that up yourself?"" I replied, ""No, you sick fuck. I'll be putting it up in my living room."""
"I'm high as a kite tied to Columbia... ...will explode any time."
"What kind of dog does Sauron have? A La-Barad-dur"
"When a boy falls, what does he fall against? His will"
"""I'm just playing devil's advocate here, but-"" *The Devil appears* ""Please do not advocate for me, you are the fucking worst."""
"[Crossword] 7 across) Person you work with, 9 letters COWORKER 21 down) Person you hate, 9 letters COWORKER"
"X post from meanjokes: michael schumacher regained consciousness today, have your heard how the doctors did it? They sat him on the window seat of the bus"