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Joke of the Day

"Q: How many Screenwriters does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The bulbs IN and it's staying IN!"

"Don't make fun of fat people; they have enough on their plate."

"I test drove a Kia today It wasn't really my Forte"

"Why do vegans hate themselves? They are animal products."

"What do you call something that is big, red, and sucks cock? A big red cocksucker."

"when Life teaches you a lesson make lessonade! im tired"

"What's the difference between a Terrorist training camp and a Pakistani kindergarten? Shit I dunno, I just fly the drone."

"Girl: I think we should just be friends Me: ya okay, but I get to be Chandler!"

"""I could eat."" - How I answer most questions, even if they're not food-related."

"I try not to tweet about things I'm doing incase it gets taken out of context, but this cock is delicious!"