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Joke of the Day

"My GF spent $49 on a haircut. Had she gone to Petsmart she'd have gotten an ear cleaning, anal gland extraction and a free bandana as well."

"I can't count how many times I failed maths at school."

"What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!"

"A punk walked into a barber's shop and sat in an empty chair. ""Haircut sir?"" asked the barber. ""No just change the oil please!"""

"Eventually we're just gonna have to accept ""ducking"" as a swear word"

"Man, I have really bad diarrhea I need to get my shit together."

"How do drown a hipster? In the main steam"

"What is Rickon Stark's favourite band? One Direction"

"I told my ex she was cross between a rare coin and female dog. A two faced bitch."

"Yo mama so fat... She takes up more mass than her thin friend."