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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a perturbed grown-up? An addled adult"

"I don't believe in hitting my children as punishment... So I send them to school in a Justin Beiber shirt and Crocs and let the other kids beat them instead"

"We Played the Guessing Game Mom: What did you do at school today? Mark: We played a guessing game. Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam? Mark: That's right."

"[visit to zoo] See kids? All these animals have to live here in cages because they woke daddy up early one time."

"Actually, I'd rather you shut your talk-hole, not your pie-hole. If you have a hole that gives pie, I'm going in there, because HELLO PIE."

"What's the difference between Sin and Shame? It's a sin to put it in, and a shame to pull it out."

"My 6 month old daughter told me this joke.... but its not funny so i won't waste your time. kids aren't funny you guys nobody cares if they told you a lame joke"

"I want to create a show called ""Deja Vu"" simply for the ""Previously on Deja Vu""."

"Headphone....... A man was on a plane when a stewardess approached him and said, ""Would you like some headphones?"" To which the man replied, ""Yes I would, but how did you know my name was Phones?"""

"A man asks his wife ""Why don't you tell me when you orgasm?"" She said ""I don't like to call you at work""."