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Joke of the Day

"What kind of bees make milk? Boobies !!! I'm sorry, I'll let myself out."

"i take valium & viagra so if i dont get a fuck i dont give a fuck"

"There once was a frenchman Yvon was his name, exploring the world he dreamed was his fame, but... He's fucking retarded."

"Here's my gym schedule. Monday, cardio. Tuesday, weights. Wednesday, 7 mile bike ride. Thursday, 15 year break. Repeat."

"How do you catch a unique bird ? Unique up on it. How do you catch a tame bird ? Tame way unique up on it."

"Henry David Thoreau walks into a bar. The bartender says: We don't serve your kind here! Thoreau replies: Walden. I'll see myself out."

"What do you call an eskimo with no friends? An iglooser"

"my dads complaining that i ate all his pills but I'M complaining that he's a giant melting prism of pure energy thats turning into a dragon"

"My friends ask me why I play soccer even though I'm not very good at it. just for kicks"

"What scratches the window before it explodes? A baby in a microwave"