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Joke of the Day

"who called it a dinosaur rap battle instead of a reptile diss function"

"Oh science, oh science, oh science!!"" ~An atheist having sex."

"you cannot glue a tomato back together with tomato paste believe me I've tried"

"Two protons walk into a black hole..."

"What's the disease that slowly turns your skin black? Rap Music"

"I don't know why people get embarrassed when they take a magazine to the toilet, you should see the looks I get when I take my plunger."

"Check for bed bugs by yelling ""Gee, I'm so happy there are no bed bugs here!"", and if you hear faint giggling, set the bed on fire."

"DATE: I'm leaving ME: Why? D: You keep pretending to be a bat M: I don't D: You're doing it right now [a single tear rolls up my forehead]"

"What do you call a hippie that can't cook? Burning ham!"

"Hearing deteriorates as we get older. So why with every new year does the sound of someone eating become louder & more annoying?"