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Joke of the Day

"I like my women like I like my coffee. Ground up and kept in the freezer."

"I went running today but came back after 5 minutes because I forgot something I forgot that I'm fat and can't run for more than 5 minutes."

"What's the difference between a Chickpea and a Garbonzo bean? I wouldn't let a Garbonzo bean all over my face."

"Why is Phoenix such a great lawyer? Because he's ""Wright"" all the time."

"Why did the boy take a ruler to bed with him? To see how long he slept."

"Helen Keller's two favorite colors Corduroy and velcro"

"My friend just joined a reggae band playing the triangle, he says it's easy... All he has to do is stand at the back 'n' ting."

"If by ""social butterfly"" you mean I will take off when you come near me, then yep."

"I used to date a girl with eczema She had cracking tits"

"My ex had weekly lessons with the devil on how to become more evil I still don't know how much she charged him though."