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Joke of the Day
"I don't mind comic sans. It's honestly a very well rounded font."
Next Joke
"You'd be surprised at all the discounts you get when you come in swinging a sword!"
"My girlfriend dumped me on a fishing trip. She left me reeling."
"Q: What county in Ireland hates ""South Park?"" A: Killkenny."
"What is ISIS' favourite file type? .exe"
"At my new job I have 500 people under me. I work on the 98th floor."
"Wife: Did you eat an ENTIRE half-gallon of ice cream?!?! Me: It was getting freezer-burned. W: I just bought it today! Me: Crazy freezer."
"How do you make a duck into a soul singer? Put it in the oven at ~~three fifty~~ tree fiddy until it's Bill Withers. Edit:summoning happened."
"What's the difference between a pianist and a penis? One tickles the ivories and one tickles the ovaries."
"Seriously, if you hacked Trump's account and wanted to make him look bad, WHAT THE HELL WOULD YOU EVEN TWEET."