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Joke of the Day

"Like most major sports injuries, almost all Rock, Paper, Scissors injuries occur because of insufficient stretching before the match."

"I head the singer of ""Chandelier"" is visiting my town I'm looking out for her, but I just can't Sia!"

"Keep your friend's clothes in your enemy's toaster."

"The kids wanted the Zero Gravity Laser Racer, a toy car that follows a laser. I handed them a flashlight and pointed at the cat."

"What religion do Saudi Arabian cows follow? Mooslim"

"I wanted to start my own last minute grandma rental service... But the name InstaGram was already taken."

"[Girl from Willy Wonka turns into a blueberry] Wonka: Call in The Blue Man Group! [Blue Man Group rolls her out while singing Eiffle 65]"

"My neighbor knocked on my door at 2am last night. 2 am! Can you believe it? How rude. Luckily I was already awake playing my drums."

"5 scientists out of 6 say that russian roulette is safe"

"What do you call a grammatically incorrect horse? An horse."