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Joke of the Day
"Quit my job at the helium factory today I refuse to be spoken to in that tone"
Next Joke
"When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts."
"Who's the top selling author in Russia? Salman Rush B"
"What's faster than light? Darkness, my old friend."
"How can you tell if a girl is too young for you? You need to make the airplane sound to put your cock in her mouth. (From one of my favorite stand-ups, Jimmy Carr!)"
"Confucius says: Man who run behind car will get exhausted but man who runs in front of car will get tyred."
"If I had a dime for every time I lost something between the couch cushions... I would probably lose those between the couch cushions too."
"Why don't you ever see hippos hiding in trees? Because they are really good at it!"
"So many babies. So little ketchup."
"Waiting for a mannequin with a gut so I can really see how that shirt will look on me."