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Joke of the Day

"Why did GG Allin leave his own concert? Shit hit the fan"

"*makes third wish* Lastly, I want to be irresistible to women. [Transformed into really nice handbag] Dammit."

"A man with dyslexia... Walks into a bra."

"The winner of Powerball should really invest in a diverse portfolio There's also Mega Millions, Tri-State, and SuperLotto."

"Dude turned from the ATM and tripped sending about eight 20s flying into my face. I teared up a little. I get strippers, I get it."

"Bee. The reason he needs an epi pen."

"A Day in the life of John Dillon. My name is John Dillon, I do all the killin', I make 5 Dollars Day. I see a Girl named kitty and she shows me her titties and she takes my 5 Dollars away."

"Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted."

"1998: stop playing pokemon and go outside 2016: stop playing pokemon and come inside"

"Hi, I'm Brandon and I'll be your hater this evening. Our specials tonight are ""ur mom"", ""lol own3d"", and ""u mad bro lol u mad?!??!"""