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Joke of the Day

"Why are all the guys banging hot chicks in porn fat and ugly? I don't know, but sign me up!"

"imagine if poop was transparent. I'd completely lose my shit"

"My kids say I need to stop trying to embarrass them but joke's on them because I'm not even trying."

"How do you make your wife scream during sex? You call and tell her about it."

"Why are red heads never calm? Because it's so easy to make a ginger snap."

"Why couldn't the salad bowl play Scrabble? It had run out of lettuce"

"Instead of calling them flyover states we should call them comments section."

"Yo mama's glasses are so thick that when she looks on a map she can see people waving."

"Did you hear about the couple who accidentally confused window putty with personal lubricant? All their windows fell out."

"Who's got two thumbs and dissociative identity disorder? *points thumbs at chest* That guy."