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Joke of the Day

"I'm in the middle of hanging myself. The suspense is killing me."

"A vegan, a vaper, and a Pitbull owner walk into a bar... ...I'd tell you what they said but I have no idea because none of them would shut up."

"What is the hardest part of rollerblading? Telling your parents that you are gay. (I'm a terrible person.)"

"I didn't plan on getting a brain transplant... But then I changed my mind."

"Sorry about all the Mario references. I didn't mean to one-up you. I'll pipe down."

"We were promised flying cars and instead all we got were magic glowing rectangles to access all the world's knowledge :("

"What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter because he's not coming"

"""on your left u see fred in camo, on your right is bertha, she has ridden many miles on that electric cart."" If walmart had tour guides."

"What do you call a deer with big eyes? A big-eye deer!"

"I like my coffee how I like my women... Without a penis."