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Joke of the Day

"Made a pact w/ my wife that if we're 40 & kids haven't stopped whining, we'll meet at top of the Empire State Building so they can't find us"

"If you throw a party how do you know Mrs. Elephant is in her period? Your mattress is missing and, theirs a quarter on the dresser."

"What do you call somebody who suffers from both depression and trisomy 21? Down's in the dumps"

"What is the difference between menstrual blood and sand? You can't gargle sand."

"Should English be the only official language of the EU? No."

"[High school reunion] Hey guys! Remember me!? ""No"" How about now? *puts an entire toilet on my head* (in unison) CHRIS!"

"What do you get when you combine Avogadro's number of avocados? GuacaMole!"

"What do you call an anorexic girl with a yeast infection? A quarter pounder with cheese."

"A man posts an original joke to http://www.reddit.com/r/Jokes"

"LEGALIZE MEDICINAL MURDER"