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Joke of the Day

"What do Jesus and a nerd have in common? Both are long-haired, live at their parents' till their 30's, and if they'll do anything, it is considered a miracle."

"Apparently if someone has a seizure in the bathtub, its in bad taste to throw your laundry in .. yep. Going to hell right here."

"I went to a bulimic birthday party. First time I've seen the cake come out of the girl."

"In June of last year, a beautiful woman on the subway saw me yawn & then she yawned. So I think we can cool it with the ""virgin"" talk."

"What's better than a rose on a piano? Tulips on an organ. Edit: accidentally a letter."

"This Jewish kid asks his dad for five dollars... and his dad goes, ""Four dollars? What do you need three dollars for?"""

"If you're a ""Blocked caller"" you're gonna be a ""missed call."""

"Why did the redditor stand on a piece of fruit to check his weight? BECAUSE HE WAS USING A BANANA FOR SCALE"

"Why can't I trust my Walmart calculator? It's always 7% off."

"I tried to get back to the drawing board but I can't draw."