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Joke of the Day
"Ketchup Bottle Joke [Source Inside]"
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"Mafia Boss: You wearin' a wire? Me: ""Wire"" you asking me that? lol get it [the rest of this tweet takes place on the bottom of a river]"
"Why was the centipede dropped from the insect football team ? He took too long to put his boots on !"
"Whats the only bad thing about head from an anorexic girl? She won't swallow"
"I call bullshit on all the times I've talked to strangers and they've not offered me candy."
"What's a policeman's favorite gaming console? Wii-U, Wii-U, Wii-U!"
"Your huge boobs really bring out my eyes."
"My boss just informed me that a birthday is not a legitimate excuse to start drinking at 8am."
"What do you find at the bottom of the lake? Bassturds."
"Did you hear about the guy who took some dude's ear off with a vacuum cleaner? His name was Mike Dyson."