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Joke of the Day

"What did the candle say when it couldn't sleep due to his own candlelight? There ain't no rest for the wicked"

"What's Fonzie's favorite indefinite article? Ehhhhhh!"

"Woah! I can move stuff with my mind. Like, my legs."

"*At the ouija board* Me: Err... mom? Can't we just... Ouija board: A-N-D A-N-O-T-H-E-R T-H-I-N-G"

"How Do You Get Stoned in Ancient Rome? Start shouting Jehovah."

"Where is the best place to find Eskimo Lesbians? At the Klondike Bar."

"What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? ""DAM!"""

"[about to see a boob for the first time] ""ok, play it cool, play it cool. don't say anything stupid"" [girl removes bra] ""whoopeeee"""

"(Misogynist Joke #4) - My girlfriend complains about how painful her period cramps are... I reminded her that's her fault for being a woman."

"How do you feel when there's no coffee? Depresso."