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Joke of the Day

"Wife: ""I look fat. Tell me something to make me feel better."" Husband: ""You have perfect eyesight."""

"What's the difference between a cow and 9/11? It's easy to make the same joke about 9/11."

"A guy doesn't go into a bar... Unaware, the bartender continues serving drinks to other people."

"Have you heard about the man who got cooled to absolute zero?? He's 0K now."

"""I wasn't born yesterday"" - Lying newborn baby"

"Tried Turkish food today... It was revolting"

"[commercial for soup] Have you ever wanted to eat regular food only with water poured all over it? NARRATOR: SOUP"

"This election has been a bit like watching porn... The hype was fun but now it's over I'm disgusted by what I'm watching."

"Q: Why did the clown wear loud socks? A: So his feet wouldn't fall asleep."

"Trump just said if he's elected he'll shut down the corrugated container industry He wants to make America crate again"