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Joke of the Day

"What did the roman soldier say after crucifying Jesus? Nailed it"

"I tried on a parachute at an extreme sports retailer the other day, and asked my girlfriend how I looked. ""It suits you down to the ground"", she said."

"set a fire for a man and he is warm for a day, set him on fire and he is warn for the rest of his life"

"Why does the French flag have Velcro? So the blue and red sections are easily removed during a time of war."

"Cop: Know why I stopped u? ""Cuz im going too fast?"" Cop: Yes, slow down. ""But it's been 6 months-"" Cop: U can't move in with her yet."

"I'm not a Reddit admin... But 20 McNuggets is 20 McNuggets"

"Where do you find an enlightened mosquito? In Bhuddapest"

"What does a mechanic do for a one night stand? ... He nuts and bolts."

"What should vegetarians eat for protein? Meat."

"Kristen Stewart is unable to be here today, so accepting the award on her behalf is this large bowl of cold mashed potatoes."