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Joke of the Day

"I like my coffee like I like my women... Ground up and in the freezer."

"Records have revealed that Hitler had a ""deformed micropenis""... A little ironic, since he's universally remembered for being a huge dick."

"What can you add to any food to make it taste better? The word ""free"""

"Recently had a cat-scan. They didn't find any cats."

"Why did the strawberry go out with the pineapple? Because he couldn't get a date!"

"When I quit my job I'm going to barge into my boss's office, slam my gun and badge on his desk, and storm out of this Arby's forever."

"I plan to donate my liver to an alcoholic so i'll know it's a match"

"A man asks a woman: ""-Did you know that laughter is second best way to convince a girl to have sex with you ? "" ""-Really, what is the first ?"" ""-A knife."" ""-Hahaha, you're so funny !"" ""-Good choice."""

"Starbucks this morning looks like a scene from ""The Walking Dead."""

"What part of a chicken is a musical instrument? The drumstick. (Had this joke stuck in my head for a while so felt like sharing it.)"