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Joke of the Day
"DATE: Are you a dog person or a cat person? DOG: Cat person, definitely."
Next Joke
"""FUCK. It's only lettuce."" - What my dog thinks when I drop lettuce on the floor"
"When someone tries to hand me a baby, I say, ""No, thanks. I'm vegetarian."""
"What do you call a very smart glass of lemonade that is gay? A homo-genius mixture"
"Guy in USA:(phone) you ready? Guy in Australia: (phone) hell yeah Both:123 *each drop a piece of bread onto ground* Both: EARTH SANDWICH!"
"Why do hipsters love 'Raiders of the Lost Ark'? because it was the first Indie film."
"Lol (sorry for my bad english)"
"People are like slinkys... ... they're no fun to look at but when you push em down the stairs you cant help but smile."
"Haven't worn a bra in 4 days.... I love being a man"
"Took me three hours to drive home through the snow, but it was worth it because when I got home, my family totally ignored me."