160884

Joke of the Day

"Have you heard of nihilism? Its kind of a Nietzsche philosophy."

"How does Ohm conduct an orchestra? Standing on his head!"

"What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Phelps can actually finish a race."

"I just walked in on my manager vigorously masturbating. He told me to stop vigorously masturbating and get the hell out of his office."

"Nostalgia isn't what it used to be..."

"Who is the most musical Canadian heroine? Laura C-Chord."

"*sees a car with a ""how am i driving"" bumper sticker* *calls the phone number* ME: buddy i think it's with a steering wheel"

"So this morning I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day."

"Dont be afraid of change, its inevitable. Unless youre homeless. Then you might have to go around asking for it. By the way, I dont have any"

"What do you call part of a poem written by a Seinfeld character? A George Costanza."