16049

Joke of the Day

"What happens when the smog lifts in Los Angeles? U.C.L.A"

"I hope Death is my father... because he'll never get me."

"""What's taking the pharmacist so long? It's just one prescription"" *behind the counter the pharmacist is sinking in quicksand and screaming*"

"UPS driver jumps out within 2 sec"

"One of the greatest gifts my kids have given me is my high tolerance for alcohol."

"Why do jews like jail Because of all the shackles.....im terribly sorry"

"Last year for Christmas I got a sweater, this year I am hoping for a screamer or a moaner."

"Wrote a letter to Santa today because i don't want him to think that we only talk when i want something from him."

"""Doc, I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home.'"" ""That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."" ""Is it common?"" The doctor says, ""It's Not Unusual."""

"Is sex without obligations possible after getting married? Yeah - sometimes I can have sex without promising to do the dishes afterwards."