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Joke of the Day

"A man asks his dog, ""Can you speak English?"" The dog replies, ""Por supuesto que puedo hombre no tonta, soy un perro!"""

"How does a whore relieve herself? She prosti-toots!"

"Why can't you hear a Pterodactyl in the bathroom? Because it has a silent P!"

"Did you hear of the guy who stayed up all night to see where the sun went? He just could not explain it! Then it dawned on him."

"A picture is worth three, maybe four words tops."

"Did you hear about the woman with 12 breasts? Sounds crazy, dozen tit?"

"I went to that new sexy internet cafe My server sure had a nice rack"

"[gets on Facebook] [types ""you pushed me away but expected me to stay""] [everyone nods, this is considered extremely good shit on there]"

"From Neil Gaiman's ""Sandman"" A woman is crying on the street: ""HELP! I've been reaped!"" ""You mean raped?"" asked a man. ""No! he used a scythe!"""

"What's going on in Paris is outrageous. You think the french would have surrendered by now."