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Joke of the Day

"A German man walks into a bar.. He stops midway, locks eyes with the bartender and announces: ""This is a scheduled stop."""

"Did you know there's a type of spider that eats snails and uses the shell as armor to attack birds? That's not true. I'm sorry."

"What do you give to a man that had everything? Antibiotics"

"What's worse than getting raped by Jack the Ripper? Getting fingered by Captain Hook."

"1.Not leaving my room 2.Not leaving the house 3.Missing someone's birthday party My childhood punishments have become my adult hobbies."

"White girls really love their Pumpkin Spice. Pumpkin spice lattes, pumpkin spice candles, pumpkin spice president!"

"Why was the guitar teacher arrested? For fingering A minor."

"What is E.T. short for? So he can fit into his spaceship."

"Why does LeVar Burton not like to travel by airplane? He usually flies twice as high."

"Start a mathematical hip-hop duo called ""E"" Because E equals MC^2"