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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the two antennas that got married? The ceremony was alright, but the reception was fantastic!"

"What do you call a terrorist cowboy? A jiiiiiihadist. Not sorry."

"Why is Hillary Clinton unfit to be president? Because she doesn't go to the gym"

"Nobody ever explained similes to me; I honestly cannot tell you what it has been like."

"Yep, it's a Yo-Mama joke Yo Mama'a so fat that when she goes to New York people say: That's one Big Apple."

"When I catch my dog sleeping, I shave dicks into his fur."

"[After losing a rap battle] ""How did he get a hold of my credit score?"""

"Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he drank herbal tea before it was cool."

"What was used to grow crops on Mars in the movie Martian? Good Shit"

"[Commercial for babies] *100 year old woman trying to feed a brick a bottle of milk* ""There's got to be a better way"""