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Joke of the Day

"A girl phoned me the other day and said, ""Come on over, there's nobody home."" I went over. Nobody was home."

"It's too bad your funny status was ruined by your inability to spell."

"What did one ocean say to the other? ""Check out this awesome plane I got! I hear Malaysian is a pretty rare brand."" ""Nah man, they aren't; I got one too."""

"What do you call a daredevil Gigolo with dwarfism? A Stunted Stunt Stunter."

"In congested traffic, it's best to stay on the right side of the road. It'd be a real tragedy if you were on the wrong side."

"I waited around all morning for the mailman so I could grab his hand through the mail slot."

"Massive US blizzard advancing north. African American community complains about exclusion of black snowflakes."

"People are mad because MTV doesn't show music videos. What about Fox News? They haven't shown a fox in months. (Craig Ferguson)"

"How to keep an idiot busy (answer is in the description) How to keep an idiot busy (answer is in the title)."

"finally got to see someone in my facebook feed react to an onion article as if it were real news. today was a big day."