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Joke of the Day

"Whenever I see a big guy beating up a little guy I ALWAYS jump in to help cause there is NO WAY the little guy can take us both."

"A friend made a list of questions for his mom to answer about childhood flashbacks She threw them out"

"You can't compare Tim Cook and Donald Trump It's like comparing apples to oranges."

"I've only had one car accident in the last month. It was a hit and run, so technically it doesn't even count."

"1-buy waterbed 2-fill with wine 3-get Capri Sun straw 4-never leave your bed again"

"All the world is a stage, and the only seats I can afford are obstructed view."

"How many potatoes a day will make you fat? 00000"

"Why do trees die? They become board."

"A man is at the checkout to purchase some condoms... ...the cashier asks, ""Would you like a bag as well?"" the man replies, ""Oh, no thank you--she isn't that ugly."""

"What's the best part of being a man? You don't have to sleep next to a hairy asshole for the rest of your life."