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Joke of the Day

"Whenever I see a big guy beating up a little guy I ALWAYS jump in to help cause there is NO WAY the little guy can take us both."

"Me: I'll take one insurance Insurance salesman: It doesn't work like that Me: *shoving $12 in his breast pocket* your best one, please"

"Several toilets were stolen last night. Police say they have nothing to go on."

"Q:Why doesn't ed have a girlfriend? A: because she ran"

"WHAT DO WE WANT!!! A cure for hangovers WHEN DO WE WANT IT!!! Please stop yelling"

"I bet the best way to disguise your surveillance van is not to use van at all. Like, whoa, who's in that hot air balloon? Probably not cops."

"How to lose 12 lbs in 7 agonizing seconds: Step 1: Make sure the wood chipper is all gassed up."

"Q: What do you call the loser in a hissing scratching cat fight? - A: Claude"

"Final words to David before surgery: ""If I don't make it? Swear you'll have me cremated & snort my ashes off a hooker's ass."" He promised."

"Funniest Superbowl moment The Broncos..."