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Joke of the Day

"I kept telling a pun to the passersby during a marathon It was a running joke."

"Sometimes when I'm riding in an uber, I like to request another uber. Instant car chase."

"What's the difference between firewood and a jew? The firewood ain't been turned into ash yet."

"Twilight werewolf Taylor Lautner turns 18 today. That makes him 126 in dog years so, unfortunately, we're going to have to put him to sleep."

"Did you hear about the guy who's been pickpocketing midget charity workers? How could someone stoop so low?"

"One day you're going to meet the girl of your dreams And she won't want your money She won't want your house, or your car She won't want you either ;)"

"What can 5 men do that 5 women can't do? Pee in a cup."

"I'm not a lucky man I once gambled on a couch and won a baby"

"A weasel walks into a bar And asks for a beer. The bartender says ""we can't serve alcohol to you."" ""I'll just take a pop"" goes the weasel."

"How do you make a nun pregnant? NSFW Dress her up as an altar boy."