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Joke of the Day

"*Sleeping Beauty gives rotten apple to Obama* *Obama faints* Only a kiss from his one true love will save him *Biden takes out lipstick*"

"I don't have a swimmer's body. I have more of a drowning to death body. #Olympics"

"What do LotR and Brokeback Mountain have in common? Someone's ring gets broken."

"How can you tell if you're Canadian (Italian joke) Go to a cliff and yell ""Mangia"". If your echo says "" cake""...."

"Just checked my Farmville for the first time in a year. It's now a Walmart."

"-""I hear the Israeli PM isn't too worried about that latest hack because.."" -""Please don't"" -""...Benjamin's Not on Yahoo"" -""I'm leaving you"""

"Me and Julio At Least 500 Feet Away From the Schoolyard"

"The difference between your husband and your Netflix account is, over time, your Netflix account learns what you like."

"Did you hear about the Polish suicide bomber? 42 successful missions"

"What did the group of unborn babies say when they were hungry? Fetus."