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Joke of the Day

"Tech support in the military Troubleshoot to kill."

"What's the difference between a black man and Batman? Batman can walk into a store without Robin."

"What do the janitors clean the Reddit office with? Derpentine."

"How many livers do people have? I want to make sure I have a backup before I put this thing on Ebay."

"I think it's fair to question whether or not Barack Obama is an American. I mean, look at him. He's awfully thin..."

"I'm terrified to death of someone stealing my identity and improving my credit"

"Cop: Why are your eyes bloodshot? Me: My girlfriend dumped me and I was crying... Cop: Oh. Me: ...so I smoked weed to feel better."

"Someone asked me to name my favorite composer... It made me Bach. I couldn't get a Handel on it. I had to make a Liszt."

"How's college supposed to prepare you for the real world? All it does is make you tired and stressed out and anxious and nevermind I get it."

"How is a chicken like a grape? They're both purple except for the chicken."