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Joke of the Day
"""Where do you see yourself in five years?"" In 2020."
Next Joke
"most offensive jokes I want to hear the most offensive jokes you have ever heard or told. Send that shit in. Because I loves me some offensive jokes."
"Three infinite things Only three things are infinite: 1. Universe 2. Human stupidity 3. WinRar trial"
"Why did the sperm cross the road? I put on the wrong sock this morning :("
"*renames my kids South and East, and leaves them on Kanye's doorstep*"
"My mom sent me a two paragraph email to inform me that she had called customer service and received $17 off her flight to see me."
"I just spent ten minutes waving back to a guy in a storefront window before I realized he was just cleaning the glass."
"In American politics, what's important is that you pick one of two equally bad sides and defend it no matter the awful garbage it produces"
"Nothing says ""Proper Retirement Planning"" like a garbage can full of losing lottery tickets"
"Practice safe lunch... Use a condiment."