71967

Joke of the Day

"My mom sent me a two paragraph email to inform me that she had called customer service and received $17 off her flight to see me."

"What do you call an innovation in scissors? Cutting-edge technology"

"What do you call a guy who wears two condoms? Justin Case"

"[Gets shot by mugger] Girl walks by: omg are u ok? I'm dying [sees she isn't wearing a ring] I mean I'm fine but not as fine as you, sup?"

"Cologne - because people shouldn't have a choice whether or not they want to smell you."

"My Home Internet Password 2kids1dog. Thats an orgy I don't want to be apart of."

"I hate cereal killers they go against the grain"

"The pimp hand... Strong enough for a man, made for a woman."

"What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders"

"A corgi walks into a bar Bartender: what can I ge... Corgi: I'll have a jack and coke Bartender: why the short paws?"