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Joke of the Day

"The Koreans were printing with movable type in 1403. I was in 1402 and the noise kept me awake all night. - from MASH"

"Lightly used fish tank for sale on eBay. Does not contain three goldfish ghosts."

"Why do people who drink milk struggle to walk? Because they lactose."

"What is the similarity between an airplane and a woman? The cockpit"

"How does a leopard change its spots ? When it gets tired of one spot it just moves to another !"

"Why should you send your sweetie a valentine? Because you always heart the one you love."

"Why are there never any cool side affects from drugs? Like ""this drug may cause severe sexiness"""

"I was inept with girls in high school. Once I tried to unhook a bra strap and accidentally made a macrame plant hanger."

"What does an octopus have ten of? Tickles..."

"Why didn't the weightlifter like doing chest exercises with Coke cans? Because it was soda pressing."