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Joke of the Day

"Why do people who drink milk struggle to walk? Because they lactose."

"My friend had his assignment on plagiarism stolen so he copied mine. He then proceeded to take a course on Nihilism but it ended up not having a meaningful impact on his transcript."

"Is it racist that I think all of Tyler Perry's movies look alike?"

"I like my women like i like my toilet paper. Soft, but not weak."

"One time we ran out of soap- -so we had to use hand sanitizer!!!"

"What do you call a dead chicken that likes to throw things? A **Poultry**geist. Thanks! I will show myself out."

"What's E.T. short for? Cus he's got little legs"

"She asked if I wanted to eat ass... I said no because it'll taste like shit"

"MILLION DOLLAR IDEA: An alarm clock that sounds like a dog's pre-puke warning grunts."

"I knew I was destined to be a psychologist not a magician... ...when I pulled a habit out of a rat."