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Joke of the Day

"Here's to the stork that brings good babies... Here's to the stork that brings good babies, the raven that brings bad babies, and to the swallow...that brings *no* babies!"

"My tire was thumping, I thought it was flat. When I looked at the tire, I noticed your cat. Sorry!"

"I guess I am not so smart! cuz i cannot *make-up* my mind!!"

"Two guys on /r/Jokes walk into a bar One adds lines after the punchline, while the other doesn't. The one who never adds these extra lines kicks the one who does. Son of a b****!"

"1. Pick jeans to wear 2. Pull them up to thighs 3. Pants dance for 3 minutes 4. Take pants off 5. Put sweatpants on 6. Cry, eat pumpkin pie"

"Their are two sides to a political argument. Right wing and wrong wing."

"What's the difference between a microwave and anal sex? A microwave won't Brownen your meat"

"Eat* a big** bowl*** of Cheerios****! Part***** of any healthy****** breakfast*******! [please read warnings and disclaimers carefully]"

"A mayfly walks into a bar. The bartender asks: ""Why don't you fly?"" The mayfly responds: ""Because it's not May, you fucking idiot"""

"(OC) A little joke I just made up... Homeless people never get inside jokes."