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Joke of the Day

"The glass ceiling is dangerous. I can't believe they'd let a woman up there. (Credit to Raising Hope)"

"If a deaf person gets arrested Does the officer still have to read them their rights?"

"growing up my sister was a cutter... thankfully, she got help and no longer cut herself; she would just ask me to do it..."

"Arnold Schwarzenegger glancing up excitedly and then looking away disappointedly multiple times while watching the intro to ""Hey Arnold"""

"I still remember what my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket... ""How far do you think I can kick this bucket?!"""

"Sorry I commented on that video of your kid taking his first steps with ""aw look you taught it how to walk on its hind legs!"""

"Are you a psychic porn star? Because you're blowing my mind"

"Why can't you trust atoms? Because they make up everything!"

"I just noticed how high the prices were for the Adele concert So I said ""Heeeellloooooooo from the Parking loooooooooottt"""

"What rhymes with orange No it doesn't"