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Joke of the Day

"Batman Pros: Intelligence, strategist, master fighter, money, Shit shaped like bats, Alfred Cons: Robin"

"So, I was at work the other day and... My manager asked, ""How good are you at PowerPoint?"" I said, ""I Excel at it."" He replied, ""Was that a Microsoft Office pun?"" I was like, ""Word."""

"What did the Jewish pedophile say to the kid? Would you like to buy some candy?"

"I relate to #PizzaRat because if I found a slice of pizza as big as a car you can bet I'd try my best to take that thing home."

"""Move miss, please get out of the way. Please get out of the way, miss. Please get out of the way.""- Ludacris's cousin, Kurteous"

"Paris Hilton picked up the new Galaxy Note 7.... That's Hot."

"Having my wisdom teeth pulled. They have nothing left to teach me. I must learn on my own from now on."

"I lay on the grass looking up at the clouds. 'That woolly one looks like a fist' I say, as Jack punches me again."

"July 4th celebrates the original Brexit. Thanks George"

"What did the optometrist give Helium? A pair of noble glasses"