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Joke of the Day

"My wife told me I needed to stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe."

"What do vegan zombies eat? Graaaaains!"

"My Thai girlfriend says penis size shouldn't matter in a healthy and loving relationship. I still wish she didn't have one."

"Q: What is the tallest building in the entire world? A: The library, because it has so many stories."

"How do you confuse a Jew? Tell him pork is on sale!!!"

"In honor of To Set A Watchmen coming out soon, what would Harper Lee's book be called if she was Mexican? Tequila Mockingbird."

"Did you hear the amusement park was offering free bungee jumping? No strings attached!"

"Q. What are 2 girl chickens that fall in love? A. Lesbi-hens"

"The best place to have a third nipple is on the palm of your hand so when you shake hands with someone you can sue for sexual harassment."

"Friend: *singing along* But I'm a creep. I'm a widow. Me: Weirdo. Friend: Sorry, I'll stop. Me: No, he says...yeah okay, thanks."