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Joke of the Day

"Help! I need a communist christmas one liner! Going to a Christmas party with a communist christmas sweater. Need a good one liner... help!"

"Have you ever met a fractal? They're so conceited. I mean, they're so full of themselves."

"My sex life is like Blackjack... I always hit on 16."

"Why is it that when Dick Cheney shot someone in the face, nothing happened, but when Clinton did it he was impeached?"

"[USPS] M: *hands change of address form* C: Ma'am, this just says ""bathtub."" M: I live there now. C: We can't send mail to a bathtub. M: Yay"

"What do you call a man with his arm up a horses butt? An Amish mechanic."

"Why did the fastest animal on earth got disqualified on the race? Because it is using steroids."

"Lorena Bobbit died in a car accident today From what I hear, some dick cut her off."

"Just did my taxes. Put $420.69 on every line and 5 IRS agents just showed up at my door with a keg, 3 strippers and giant foam fingers."

"I've never been to Prague... But I've always wanted to Czech it out!"