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Joke of the Day

"There is a new kind of bread in the Ukraine that is the most popular. I don't know what it is called but it is Putin free."

"What sound does a Chinese cat make? Mao"

"Hey Kevin, why do you like fungi on your pizza? Cause I'm a vegetarian."

"Thinking is bad... thinking is bad... it ruins every 3 out of 2 relationships"

"An Atheist, a Vegan, and a Jehovah's Witness walk into a bar.. I know because they told everyone in less than a minute."

"What did hitler say on his cake day? YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN USING THE OVENS FOR THE FINAL SOLUTION!"

"The mods removed the previous joke that summited about my penis. It was improperly tagged as long."

"*first date* Me: Tell me more about you Her: *crazy eyes* WELL I HAVEN'T STABBED ANYONE LATELY Me: *deletes Tinder* Let's get married!"

"So I'm taking a Terrorism and Covert Politics class Pretty sure I bombed the midterm."

"Whos the coolest guy in hospital? The ultra-sound guy. Who takes over when hes on holiday? The hip-replacement guy"