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Joke of the Day

"How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the lightbulb has to want to change."

"How many police officers... How many police officers does it take to push a black man down the stairs? None, he fell!"

"Trump is a great guy. He's giving two million illegal immigrants free trips to Mexico."

"My wife gets kind of bitchy once a month. It usually lasts about 30 days."

"I had to clean out my spice rack and found everything was too old and had to be thrown out. What a waste of thyme."

"I TRADED MY ALARM CLOCK FOR A KOALA SO I CAN SLEEP UNTIL HE STARTS BEGGING FOR LEAVES WHICH'S LIKE 3 DAYS"

"How do you greet a racist murderer? Good morning officer ."

"My favourite position in bed...... The side nearest the socket so i can play with my phone while it's charging"

"Has anyone seen my sex doll? Of course I checked the tree house. Oh wait, it's here on the front lawn, still in your wedding dress LOL"

"I had an uncle who worked at a whiskey factory. He fell into a vat and drowned 6 hours later. He would have drowned earlier but he got out 3 times to pee."