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Joke of the Day

"What would Jesus's favorite gun be? A nail gun"

"Damn girl are you a graveyard because I'm dying to get in you"

"I had all these small cheese squares but nothing to put them on. I was really cracka lackin'."

"If men knew the effect their scent has on women, they'd shower more and fart less."

"I'll drink responsibly when there is a brand of vodka named Responsibly"

"A blonde and a brunette are discussing the previous night out... The brunette says, ""Last night I slept with a Brazilian."" ""Oh my god!"" the blonde replies. ""How many is THAT?"""

"The waiter hands me a bowl of alphabet soup ""Compliments of the chef"" The soup reads ""you're beautiful"""

"I don't know why women spend so much money on sunglasses... Wouldn't it be cheaper to just tint the kitchen windows!"

"If you woke up in the woods with a handful of leaves and a condom hanging out of your butt, would you tell anyone? Wanna go camping?"

"I wonder why so many of us don't read our own emails and texts closely... ...until AFTER we have hat the 'send' button."