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Joke of the Day

"Sext: You are a butterfly. I am a caterpillar. Surprise twist, I am Chris Hansen in a caterpillar suit. You are under arrest."

"What's at the end of Moby Dick? A whale of a time!"

"The field sobriety test was going ok until I grabbed two traffic cones and did a Madonna impersonation."

"Why do the horses hate the jockey? Because he's a horse racist."

"Twitter is perfect for men, because with men brevity is key. Beyond 140 characters they know they're going to say something wrong."

"Q: What's the difference between a horse and the weather? A: One is reined up and the other rains down."

"What do you call two lesbian dinosaurs? Lickalotypus."

"Why did the pirate captain suddenly die? He had an an*yarr*ysm."

"I've missed the last 50 years of ""Doctor Who."" Can somebody quickly catch me up?"

"Do we even know how much anything else costs in Africa? Maybe $1 a day to feed a child is way too much."