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Joke of the Day

"A heads up.. So when searching for a place to eat at work and a coworker tells you about The Black Angus Campfire Feast and the boss is standing behind you. Check the spelling before hitting enter."

"I got arrested for punching this guy at a new years eve party..... when you here an Arab counting down from ten your instincts kick in."

"Lion King Today, someone told me Mufasa died 22 years ago. I replied, ""I guess he needs to Mufasa next time so he doesn't die."""

"I've always wanted to be a plumber... but my friends all say it's just a pipe dream."

"How can you tell if someone is a pilot? They'll just tell you."

"Q: What does Clinton have in common with his Hollywood pals? A: They all make a living by lying to people."

"If anyone needs me, I'll be over at facebook, actin' creepy."

"I probably would have been a pretty good doctor, until I found out that I still get paid if the people die. Then I'd just be like, whatever"

"What's the difference between a baby and a window You can't rape a window"

"A way you can tell the difference between a plumber and a chemist ask them to pronounce the word 'unionized'"