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Joke of the Day

"So Howard Webb has retired from refereeing..In his honour, Manchester United have retired the penalty spot."

Next Joke
 
"Excuse me, waiter. Is my order almost ready to Instagram?"
"What did the farmer say when he tried to milk the cow, but nothing came out? ""Time to try the udder one."""
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"How do you make a little girl cry twice. You rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear."
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"Curious about sex"
"What do you call a sad robot? A woebot. :("
"Why did the emo swallow an alarm clock? So he could wake up inside."
"Did you hear about the bird that lost all of its feathers in a volcano? It was moltin'."
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