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Joke of the Day
"I like my women how I like my wine... ...Locked down in the basement"
Next Joke
"The only 'B' word you should ever call a woman is ""beautiful""... ...because bitches love it when you call them ""beautiful"""
"I beat up a drummer in marching band. I'm not afraid of any re-percussions."
"So I applied for a random volunteer job at my church I really hope I get the missionary position"
"My doctor said that she thinks I have irritable bowel syndrome. I'm not surprised, I irritate everyone else so it makes sense that my bowels would be sick of my shit."
"A nude man walks into a doctor's office. A nude man walks into a doctor's office wrapped in Cellophane from head to toe. The doctor says, ""Well, clearly I can see your nuts."""
"Leading up to the wedding (NAME) has been on a whiskey diet. His lost three days already."
"What's the difference between pink and purple? The grip."
"Why didn't the ghost have any babies? Because he had a Halloweenie! (Hollow-weenie)"
"""Oh, no. No, no, no. Are you kidding me?"" -First thing I would say if someone raised me from the dead"